He calls another woman’s name in his sleep




Last year I discovered that my husband was sleeping with one of his workers inhis office. She is a girl I was fairly used to and when confronted, my husband admitted everything and promised to call things off. He did and the girl in question eventually found another job.

Since she left my husband’s employment, things have been getting much better in our relationship, but one thing really baffles me: he calls out this girl’s name in his sleep, saying how much he wants her and at the same time, he is caressing me. I’m really devastated by this. Do you think he still loves her?

He tells me he has no recollection of even dreaming about her. Jolade, by e-mail. Dear Jolade, Your husband is justified. You are trying to come to terms with your husband’s affair and rebuild the trust in your marriage when you are faced with something you can’t really control.

What you may not realise is the fact that your husband might also be trying to come to terms with the end of the affair. It’s not that he wants his lover back – his affair ended for good when she left the scene and he is obviously still feeling guilty and bad about himself.

His bedtime antics might be his efforts to flush her out of his system and not necessarily an indication that he still hankers after her. They’re much more likely to be the final emotional pains as he lets her go for good. As long as your relationship is getting steadily better, trust what happens when your husband is awake rather than asleep.